Last night, while I was in the kitchen making dinner with my husband, my phone chimed. A text! It was an invite to a friend’s catered birthday dinner—a truly amazing experience, no doubt, and of course, I wanted to celebrate her. The catch? It was $150 per person. We checked our calendar, confirming we were free, and planned to respond in the morning.
But as I lay awake that night, something felt… off. The next morning, my husband and I talked about it. We had the money, but neither of us felt like this expense would genuinely move us toward our financial goals. Ultimately, we decided to decline the invitation and find another way to celebrate our friend.
This scenario plays out repeatedly with my clients: once we start working together, they make massive strides toward their financial goals. In most cases, their income hasn’t even changed (though that’s always a bonus!). So, how is this possible?
The main reason is clarity around their goals and an increasing intentionality about how they spend.
They start running every financial decision through a mental filter: “Is this purchase truly in alignment with my goals?”
The truth is, there are endless ways to spend money, both personally and in your business. That’s why implementing value-based spending is incredibly beneficial.
Regardless of your financial situation, using your values as a filter before making a purchase is a game-changer.
My general rule of thumb: “If it isn’t a hell yes, it’s a no.”
Your Guide to Identifying Your Top Values
You can download my list of value here. This exercise is incredibly powerful. If you’re in a relationship, I recommend doing this separately first, then coming together to discuss your answers. It’s crucial to respect each other’s perspectives and look for areas of overlap.
Step 1: Brainstorm Your Personal Values
- What truly matters most to you in life?
- What experiences bring you the most joy?
- What causes or principles do you passionately support?
- What kind of legacy do you want to build?
Step 2: Prioritize Your Top 3 Values From your brainstormed list, narrow it down to the 3 values that resonate most deeply with you right now. These are your core financial compass points.
Step 3: Take Action: Align Your Spending with Your Values Now that you’ve identified your top values, it’s time for the critical step: examining if your current spending truly aligns with them. Explore this using the prompts below:
1) Are there any of these values that you feel are completely unsatisfied or underfunded at the moment?
2) Do you feel overall that you embody these values in your life right now? If so, how? And if not, why not?
3) What do you think is preventing you from embodying this value in your life?
4) When you think about each value, can you see how it’s translating into any particular actions or behaviors you have or want to have in your life?
5) Which expenses on your budget, and which commitments on your calendar currently satisfy these values?
6) Is there anything on the budget that is not going to your values and no longer seems worth it?
7) Were there any values not being supported? And if so, how can we direct more resources to funding that value?
8) Do you generally feel your money is aligned with these values? If someone saw your spending would they be able to tell that this is your value system?
9) How does your current goal of _______________ support these values?
10) Is there anything else you can do to direct some money to one of your values?
11) Is there anything that you’d like to do to celebrate what you’ve already achieved as far as living your life according to your values?
Ultimately, money is a powerful tool to build the life you truly desire. The most effective way to wield that tool, regardless of your income level, is to ensure every dollar is spent in a way that’s deeply meaningful to you. When your spending aligns with your values, every financial decision becomes an empowering step toward your best life.
I’m curious – what are your top three core values that guide your spending and your life?
